Flowers are for the Living: Mother's Day 2022
Mother's Day is a day for all moms - the young moms, the older moms, and those moms whose children are no longer with us. Let them feel this day in their souls and be kind.
Mother's Day 2022
The Irish have a saying for everything and this is one I heard frequently from my mom, passed down to her from her mom, my nanny. We all knew that it meant you needed to appreciate people while they’re here and not wait until they’re deceased to bring them flowers.
As Mom’s Day approaches, I always reflect upon her bravery at boarding a ship at age 20 and traveling from Northern Ireland to a new country to meet her fiancé, my dad. She left her own “Mum” behind thinking she would never see her again.
A Mother's Legacy
Mother’s Day has always been about my mom - her legacy, making sure I honor and thank her for all her sacrifices and who she was as a woman. Although I am also a mom, this day can bring a bit of melancholy thinking of my mom who died many years ago.
But I feel this day is for all moms: the young moms figuring out their own role day by day, and the older moms being appreciated by their adult children. This day is also about those moms whose children are no longer here on the earth. They may have lost pregnancies, infants, toddlers, teens or adults children, who are not here to celebrate their lives. Some children lost without ever getting an answer to as why, in the case of miscarriage and stillbirth, due to an illness such as cancer or to the heartache of addiction. All those moms note this day in their souls as well.
Another common phrase my mom would say as we were leaving the house (every time!) was “Be Careful”. With her Irish brogue it sounded like, “Be Cur-ful”, and this pronunciation became a family joke. I can only imagine how she would be reacting now in these times of so much illness. We now live in a time when we do have to be more careful and aware of our health and safety.
Covid and Being a Mother
There have been many losses during the pandemic and some moms have died without their children by their sides or have left this world knowing they are leaving children behind. Many traumatic circumstances have been unfolding due to Covid. So how do we embrace this day and every holiday during stressful times? Lean in, appreciate the now, as that is all we really have is the present. Honor those we love that are still around and all of those that we miss, as well as taking care of ourselves.
What does that mean, “self-care”? Being kind to ourselves and compassionate to others, not adding pressure that any holiday needs to perfect. Appreciate nature and nurture those human and furry ones around us. Do for another to pay it forward if you are blessed.
With the changes in air travel, my mom did get to see her mom again. My dad made sure she came to visit for 6 weeks every summer so my mom could get her fix of home. Their leap of faith benefited the whole family. I was able to have Nanny in my life growing up thanks to my dad and Aer Lingus.
This year, make room on Mother’s Day for all the moms, with all their stories. Be brave & be cur-ful...and share some flowers, too. Happy Mom’s Day! 🌸
Thank you so much to #teamsoulspring counselor Cindy Gourley LMHC. for her contribution to the content of this article.
